We covered her flowers with happy kisses

Our intent to leave joy
at the door of a sad friend.

The boys and I strapped
into our four wheeled

“space ship” and under
a dark sky given an orange

crescent moon, we decided
adventuring was much more

fun than going to sleep.

Lightening lingered across

the dark, long and low
like an ignited cloud. Dramatic

spikes of white flashing
down. A warm air, Vagabond

Radio on KRCL. A voyage across
the valley and back around

the base of Mt. Olympus…
it’s north side scattered

with pockets of orange flame.
As the boys drifted off to sleep,

I drove past places
I had lived. I had LIVED them.

They BREATHED me.
I still feel that breathe.

Memories breathing my
core with their life. I found

myself crossing barriers
of time. Revisiting,

recounting, reclaiming
the beauty and even shame.
Adventures unfolding
and humbling me.

I took notice
of the lighting around

and within each home.
Each so different in invitation.

Bright white halogen,
softened yellows, subtle

ambience and blinding
boldness. I thought of the

comforts people sought
inside. What brings us comfort

and security? What allows
survival through our pains

and tragedies? In a moment
all that is past returns so alive.

Hearts break open for beauty
and grace. Perhaps when we

are not allowed to break, do not
allow ourselves to break,

the anger and judgement
is suffocating. I feel myself

draw in a full breath
and acknowledge a grace

that allows me to be here,
fully here in this moment

by candlelight. Our boys tucked
sweetly into bed… and I listen

to the wheels in the night
of the freeway not too far off.

Tuesday, September 22nd, 2020